I think I should know how to make love to something innocent without leaving my fingerprints

Was supposed to see Matt in like fifteen minutes...

And watch his favourite team play soccer.

I don't really like soccer.

But I agreed because he likes it. I was looking forward to seeing him.

Then I get a call from him saying he's going to some bar thing to watch the game with his dad.

Erm.... okay.... great?...

I guess now i have to wait almost 3 hours to see him.

Hm.. and I had my hopes up and everything already... gah...

On a completely unrelated subject, I need to start buying Christmas presents... including Kris Kringle for my ultra-special-secret-person... hm..plus I feel sickish....

Plus today is my six months with Matt... I guess that's one of the main reasons I wanted to see him so soon? Plus we won't get alone time later because we are going on another double date with his friend, Phil, and his girlfriend.

Hm... at first I didn't really like her...maybe it's because I don't like talking to people I don't know/ am trying to impress. I feel the need to impress all those who are a part of Matt's life. I know I should be my own persona and what not but I rather keep quiet that make myself out to be ignorant.

"It's better to have people think you are a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt"

Thanks Yohan (Y). That's a Camp O bond for you.

Well, shes really nice actually. Today we are going to Toronto's 43rth annual Calvacade of lights.... basically, we are going to go see the city's Christmas tree and all its little lights turn on.

Why does the image of the tree burning pop into my mind?

Out: Soccer, Bars

In: Christmas shopping and this song:

UPDATE: So the double date was cancelled and we just decided to go downtown for the tree thing by ourselves. It was nice... got there kind of late so we didn't really see much.. Then I made him walk through this swarm of people to get to the city's Christmas tree. I love the smell of those things. Yum. We walked around in the Eaton's Centre and went into Starbucks and Indigo. I had fun... but I always do with him.

UPDATE NUMERO DOS: Okay, we have been dating for six months now, it's about time he puts something on his msn name that hints at me. Just sayin'.

Hotel Room Service

SO, as previously stated, my birthday dinner thing with Matt is in this post while the rest of the story is here.

We were walking down the street back to the hotel when I started to shiver.. and not the little shivering thing girls do in movies.. more like actual shivering, teeth beginning to chatter, kind of shivering. And he gave me his jacket even though it was like only 3 more buildings and crossing the street. Whatevs, still sweet.

We walked back into the hotel room but I didn't feel weird again this time. Called my mom. Told her I was on my way to a sleepover at my friend's house and then she said...

"Oh.. already? call me when you get there so I can talk to her"

Greattttttttt... Can you just leave me alone and not make my life so complicated?

Guess not... I know you know I trick you. And I still outsmart you every time. No matter how much you hate my boyfriend.

That is when I called me friend and asked her to three-way my mother so she would be able to speak at the same time as myself. So I began talking to my mother and she asked to talk to my friend.. my friend timed her entrance into the conversation so perfectly, couldn't have done it better myself.

Needless to say, my mother believed it and left me to it.

Matt sang/half-danced Happy Birthday for me. I love how he is so willing to do anything that he knows will make me happy. There is a bit of coaxing and he knows it's ridiculous but he still does it.

Talked more... joked around, stuff like that... ended up falling asleep at like midnight with his arms wrapped around me.

I remember half-waking up and kissing his lips... falling back asleep... him moving away and me wrapping myself around him.. me moving and he doing the same thing... kissing each others faces... ending up awake.

Ending up awake... at 6:oo am. Instead of sleeping in, we started talking again... until his cellphone rang... at 6:20ish in the morning! It was his father...

"Where are you?"

Matt: I slept out..

"Oh okay...bye"

I love that. Then I got up and straightened my hair... played a little number game with my love... Time flew by.. His phone rang again... the taxi driver was driving back the foresaken backbag... We got ready to leave.. me carrying my flowers and him carrying the box with the cookie in it... checked out.

Walked down the street.. the looks he was getting were absolutely priceless.. he was still in his dress clothes (rawr, he's so deadly)

So then we went into the subway and went home to drop off our stuff and ended up at his practise.

*Sigh*

It was perfect :)

Spuntini

I have decided to post my brithday thing with Matt in two parts.
This is the first one
and the second part is called "Hotel Room Service"
Like the song :) yes. Pitbull. Kay good.

So this is about last Friday ... when Matt took me out for my seventeen birthday. Yay!

I bought him this huge cookie... and made him a thank you booklet kinda thing.. so he has an idea of how much I appreciate everything he does.

Let's get the the juicy stuff... ;)

So he picked me up in a taxi.. all dressed up and looking deadly as always... so I handed him the box the cookied was in with the booklet taped to the front and got into the taxi... my brother was tapping at the window nearest to me and I waved him off and then we left.... while we were driving... Matt turns over and hands me a bunch of flowers.

This, being the first time I ever receive flowers, was a very nice surprise to begin the evening with. Anyways, so we drove to the hotel (rawr) and checked in. We went into the room.. and it was dark...

I don't know. I always find things so symbolic... it was like... "hm, this is what coming home would be like"... and well it kinda felt weird for a while... not awkward but... I don't know.. weird... marriage-like?

Anyways so I changed my clothes, we talked for a bit and he opened his surprise. Which I think he liked. Hopefully. Or maybe he lied... men! ;)

Then he noticed that he left his backpack, laptop and change of clothes included, in the trunk of the taxi and called the driver up. The driver said he would deliver it to the hotel the next day.

Afterwards, we walked down the street looking for the restaurant, Spuntini, until we found it and walked up a couple of stairs.

Very impressive restaurant choice, I must say. There were practically no visible walls but, instead, tons and tons of international wine bottles sitting on shelves. And candles. Each table had it's own little candle. Which I thought was nice.

"Reservation for two"

What's your name?

"Matthew Ferreira"

Ohh, come with me.

All the people there were so friendly and so attentive to everything. They lead us to our table, which had a larger candle on it, and took our coats.

Matt sang happy birthday to me :)

We ordered. I ordered this pasta thing ( well duh, Italian restaurant) with shrimp and mushrooms and yup it was delicious.

Then Matt said...
"Hm. Candle-light dinner. I wasn't expecting thiiiiisss...."

Me: Oh?

"I lied, I asked them to get a larger candle and to make the bottom look like it had been there for a while."

Me: you lied...? you lied!

"Modesty dear, modesty"

All the little details he went through... aw, makes me feel so special. So after we finished dinner, he paid and we got up and went to look for our coats... which we couldn't find. So the host suddenly showed up and saw Matt going through other people's jackets.

Then he called the police and had Matt arrested for theft.... no thank God. :)

Instead he went to get our jackets and we left to the hotel.... but not before I took a piece of candle wax avec moi!

Birthday

yay so my birthday was fine... Matt wrote me another letter... love it! Made my day...

today's the day he is taking me out.... this shall be fun!

UPDATE: oh my god best day of my life will write on it later cuz i am doing english but oh my god

me?

I was rereading the post about my birthday and I realized that I forgot to mention the ah-mazing plans Matt has for the Friday after.

He's picking me up. Then dinner and then... a night at a hotel. Mh, interesting!

Kept reading on in that post...

"Who was I?
Better yet, how much more different am I now?"

This made me think back to that again. I know the answer. I'm exactly the same person. I'm still caring, jealous, obsessive, loving. sometimes even aggressive...It's black or white for me, always has been. Not even my feelings reflect shades of gray. They are either there or... they are not.

Anyways, digressing again. I am the same person BUT, with the experience and wisdom I have apparently gained, I realize that what I want has changed.

I don't care for conformity, or the safety of friendships, or about what other people want. I have learned to care about what I want and what makes me happy.

I always cared about what made me happy. I just put other people's happyness before mine. But now, it's about me. Because I can be happy! Because I deserve the best!

I'm so lucky I found it.

Cute

Kay maybe I won't be as busy as I originally thought. At least not for now

Christmas is coming up :) how nice.

FINALLY decided what I am purchasing for Matt. Hopefully his parents don't think of it too but, meh, I shall call them soon to ask what they are getting him.

:) good.

Spent like an hour looking at his future gift. It's awesome :) Surprise surprise.

English

I hate English class. I really do.

I love the subject but that teacher makes me dread her next few words.

Essay due soon.

May blog over the weekend but its ta-ta for now.

Ta-ta for now!